…Has never been more glaringly apparent. First there is the inevitable low to long term travel, them there is the indestructible, untouchable and unimaginable high to travelling the world in the way you dreamed about and all the ways you never imagined, followed by the anxiety and tensions of the return home. Followed by the delirium and happiness of being back with those you love, followed by the monotonous bore and chore of working to exist and existing to work. Life is by no means bad, it’s just one big, bipolar piece of confusion. After being home for 2 months, the undying and unfaltering need to return to the life of freedom is apparent and rearing it’s beautiful, beautiful head and eating away at my thoughts. This in turn, has a negative effect on what is a wonderful and fulfilling life. Life may be currently full of work, but it is still glorious and I am still alive, connected to the earth and it’s elements. But, the desire for more is far more apparent than the happiness in the current lifestyle choice. Which makes me question why is it so hard to find a happy medium? A point of equilibrium where the desire for one thing can be met happily by what is really going on. There doesn’t seem to be such a point, for me anyway. My friends definitely think I’m abit out there with my thoughts on life but until I feel the weight of all my worldly belongings on my back (note to self: take less next time), the ache in my feet after a good days exploration and the incomparable happiness found in the beauty of being at one with the simple, organic, natural existence of life, I will just be plodding along. Happily, of course, but plodding none the less.
This is a bit of a nothing post, just summing up that life is beautiful, but most of us often overlook that beauty (me included), until BOOM something hits you and you wake up and think ‘oh f#%* like is SWEET’. We should try to feel that more. I wish I could explain my strange nuggets of love for the planet with everyone, and that we could remove all the shit that ruins the simple things in life. We are beings of the land and it is within us, we should respect that and grow with it. And we should find happiness in this, even if it’s sometimes euphoric and sometimes just a little dot. I am learning to accept that the happy medium I am currently desiring is in the bottom of the ocean or in outer space, and that’s okay so long as I look at life in a simple, unfiltered way and appreciate the very wonderful, greatness of being alive.